I’d love to hear your comments on this post, especially from expats and people outside the US.  (Though I welcome feedback from anyone here, too!)  What kind of experience do you have at the doctor’s office? 

From what I can tell, it seems a typical American experience to wait one heck of a long time to see your doctor.  Now, oddly, American etiquette related to time, in business anyway, is to show up on time, or a few minutes early, typically speaking.  How many times have we heard the phrase, “Time is Money”?  So, Americans value time, and we don’t like waiting.  I can tell you, here in New York City, everyone is in a hurry and hates waiting, so you can exaggerate that frustration 100 times.

In the past few weeks, as the year winds to a close, and I’m taking advantage of my insurance deductible being met (oh, the joy of the US healthcare system) by finally going to get my check-ups, I have had 4 appointments.  Apart from 1 or 2 of my doctors, it seems a one hour wait is commonplace.  Last week, at the dermatologist, I arrived on time for my 2pm appointment.  There was 1 other person in the waiting room who was seen 5 minutes after I arrived.  The doctor strolled through the waiting room at 2:30pm, smiled, then went back to her office.  At 2:4o, I was finally brought into an exam room, and waited ANOTHER 15 minutes to see the doctor.  With no other patients around, and nothing seemingly urgent happening, I was absolutely disgusted that it took 1 hour to be seen. 

Today, I went to another doctor for an 8am appointment.  Two other women were in the waiting room, and I was told to sign in, and that someone would check me in by calling my name.  After 30 minutes, there were 8 women in the room, some of whom had already been checked in before me.  I went to the desk twice within 45 minutes, reminding them I had an 8am appointment and that people who arrived after me were being checked in before me.  Finally at 8:55, I was checked in.  I was stunned at the incompetence of a doctor’s office that made me wait almost one hour just to check in!  The funny part was, once checked in, I was seen within minutes.

Ironically, the “factory” places, like where I went to get an x-ray, took care of me immediately. Oh, and my dentist!   It seems it’s only when I have an actual appointment for a medical doctor that I end up being forced to wait around as if I have nothing better to do with my day.

The worst part of this system is, if I were to arrive late, or not at all, I’d have to pay a fee for not canceling my appointment.  So the “time is money” phrase only applies to the doctor, because it appears that a patient’s time is worthless.

I’m sure there are many of you who have had similar and even more aggravating experiences – feel free to leave a comment!

And, for those of you in or from other countries, would love to hear your experiences – either within your own country, or if you’re now living in the US, your thoughts on waiting time at the doctor’s office.

With the holidays fast approacing, if you’re an expat and can’t afford to go home, you’re no doubt in search of ways to celebrate locally, or closer to where you live.

According to AsiaOne News, there will be a lot of expats in Beijing this year! Sometimes, if you can’t be with your loved ones at home, it’s a good idea to seek out local places offering, say, food you’re accustomed to on the holidays, or, you might even find other expats from your home country celebrating the holidays in the same place as you. Why not share the festivities together?

Click here to read more about plans in Beijing to welcome foreigners. Even if you’re not in or near Beijing, it might be a good idea to inquire, locally, about what events and dinners are being planned that you can participate in – ideal to avoid being alone!

I’ve mentioned before that I love cows, though another truth is, I love animals.  If you’re looking for a fun activity after relocating, a local zoo or animal farm is another great way to spend part of a day (presuming, of course, tht you like animals.)

However, in addition to passing the time, animals can also teach you some valuable lessons.  This past weekend, I had the pleasure of visiting several animals, and the experience reminded me a bit of transitioning to another culture! (Bear with me….oops, pun intended…)

I started the day with a visit to an Alpaca farm in Upstate New York.  Sadly, for me, Alpacas are not the friendliest of animals

and didn’t seem interested in being pet.  However, as I stood among them, I realized that I was in their “world”;  I had entered their space.  This fact really hit me when I whipped out my iPhone to take the pictures you see here, and when I turned to my left, I found myself staring at a very long, black neck and a huge pair of dark eyes.  (Sadly, I was too shocked and frozen to take a photo!)  With me being, umm, vertically-challenged, the Alpaca towered over me and I wasn’t sure whether it would eat me or spit on me, but it seemed very interested in my iPhone.  Soon thereafter, another Alpaca (who apparently has arthritis, so I felt like we had an instant bond as I do, too!) approached me, and I just remained as calm as possible, while also terrified, and stifling a laugh because so many feelings ran through me at once.

I had no idea what to do.  I was a bit terrified, and figured any sudden moves would be a bad idea, and yet I also wanted to try and pet them, but figured that would be equally poor on the idea list, in case they got upset with me.  So, I let them sniff me, and then they moved on.

It’s funny, but when you move to a new place, some of your initial experiences can feel like this.  It’s a bit terrifying to be surrounded by unfamiliar people, unfamiliar buildings, and unfamiliar experiences.  You may get stuck as you try and figure out what to do to adapt to your new surroundings.  And, sometimes it’s best to give people around you the chance to welcome you, and show you proper etiquette than to just “barge in”, and try to “force” your ways on them by, shall we say, proverbally petting them.

After the Alpaca farm, I visited my cousin’s horse farm.  It was like changing countries in fifteen minutes.  The horses, after a brief “check me out and make sure I’m not a threat” period were exceptionally affectionate.  They loved having their cheeks massaged, and they also seemed hopeful that my hands might also be edible, and there was a lot of sniffing.

But, again, I had that same experience where I felt a bit like a stranger in a strange land.  Now, the friendliness of the horses made me feel very welcome, and at ease.  I know that whenever I’ve lived or traveled abroad, the people that were the most

welcoming, friendly, and interested in me, are the ones with whom I wanted to spend the most time, and with whom I had a sense of feeling at home. 

Finally, I got to play with my cousin’s dog who was a very loving new friend. For me, friendly dogs just make all of life’s little troubles melt away.  So, if you’re feeling down, and not too allergic, you might seriously want to consider spending some time with a friendly dog or cat.  I’m not sure why, but they seem to have the power to make whatever is bugging you seem insignificant.

Here are the takeaways from all my experiences this past weekend:

1. Visiting animals is a great activity, if you’re in need of ideas.
2. If you do go to a park, zoo, or elsewhere, notice how it feels to be in “their world” – try to pay attention to how you act, and react to them. 
3. You’ll learn your natural tendencies to unfamiliar situations, and perhaps figure out a couple of things you can change to attract more people to you. 
4. Try petting a dog or a cat if you are having a “down day”.  If you don’t own one, see if there might be a local shelter where you can volunteer your time to pet animals, or, perhaps you have a friend with a pet who will let you come over.
5. If you got a chuckle out of this post, you might also enjoy my earlier post about What Cows Can Teach Us About Relocating

* Want more ideas on adjusting to a new place, learning a new language, and fitting in? Check out The Personal Success Method! *

I just saw a concerning article about expatriates and infidelity.  It makes an excellent point that if you are married and considering a move to a new country, you need to carefully consider all the changes the move will bring to your family.  The article also points out that marriages that are shaky before a move tend to fall apart after a move overseas.

Click here for the full article.  What are your thoughts on this?

The holiday season is upon us! Wherever you may be, there is sure to be something happening to celebrate.

Shown here are balloons inflated the night before the Macy’s Thanksgiving parade in New York. There is a tradition I’ve never done before where you can watch them being inflated and get right next to them the night prior. It was a fun experience and there were lots of smiles all around.

Make sure to keep your eyes open for holiday markets, holiday activities like local concerts or gatherings and have fun. There’s no shortage of things to do!

One of the challenges that can occur after relocating is figuring out what activities are available, and how to go about finding them. Often times, though, it could be as simple as exploring a place you haven’t before, and then asking!

This past weekend, I had the delight of trying a tea house in Manhattan – Radiance Tea House and Books. Our host, Dan, was one of the friendliest people I have ever met. He seemed to either know all the clientele (indicating there are a lot of regulars) or else spoke to everyone like a cherished friend, certainly giving everyone the desire to return sometime soon.

The food was unbelievably good, as was the incredible selection of tea. So, I asked Dan if they

ever hold any workshops or classes, and, indeed they do! Now, I’ve heard of a wine-tasting, but tea-tastings are much less common. If you’ve never done one, I highly recommend it. What’s nice about the way Radiance Tea House offers them is that it’s in a class setting, so you’re more likely to meet other people, rather than going to a tea place and doing your own tasting.

The other activity they offer is a Tea Ceremony. This is another more unusual activity that you probably don’t come across on your average day. In fact, there are probably many activities around you, but if you’re intent on doing things that are familiar to you, you are most definitely missing out on opportunities to learn something new, and to meet new people.

What’s important for you to take away is that-

1. wherever in the world you are, when feeling bored, or unable to find new activities, you must make an effort to try new places – even if you have to take out a guide-book in a city you think you know pretty well.
2. If you find someplace you like, speak with the host, waiter, or owner and ask them if they give any classes – here it was about tea, but if you’re in a restaurant, it could be that they offer cooking class. (I’ve actually come across one such place in New York, Camaje, and it was a fantastic experience!) If you’re in a museum, perhaps it’s a unique tour, or a drawing class, etc.
3. Activities come in all “shapes, colors and sizes”. The more open you are to trying something you’ve never done before, the more likely you’ll find things to do.
4. The key is, seek out new things, and ask questions!
5. Check out my Personal Strategies Method eBook for more helpful ideas and strategies to find activities you love and more after moving.

CountryRep_2009_Complimentary_Report

Switzerland tops list of 2009 country reputation report conducted by the Reputation Institute.  Russia is at the bottom of  the list. Open the report to learn the factors that went into the rankings, and all the scores. This could be helpful for you if you’re trying to decide between several locations for an expat opportunity.

I went to the gym today and had a small epiphany about transitioning to a new culture. (I realize how bizarre that sounds!)

I went to one of those Total Body Conditioning classes where they have you lift weights so that, at the end, your muscles are so depleted you can barely exit the room. However, I tried a different instructor than usual.  He made us do a lot more cardio work than I had been doing in my other class.  My heart rate skyrocketed to the point of discomfort.  But, it made me realize I was feeling my heart work, something none of the previous classes had done for me.

We had to do poses and weight-lifts I had never seen before.  I was utterly confused, but realized my body was getting the benefit of an entirely new set of moves.

Finally, when stretching, he made us stretch our legs in a method I can only describe as contorting ourselves into an upright pretzel. I had no idea my body could even enter into the position he made us hold!

Then it hit me – this class was a bit like transitioning to a new culture. 

1. I started the new class feeling completely lost.  I didn’t know anyone, nor could I quite keep up with all the exercises.  I was also very uncomfortable with how fast my heart was beating.  I wondered what I got myself into. When you move someplace new, that “out of place” feeling hits hard at the beginning, and it can be very uncomfortable as you settle in.
2. I tried movements I had never done before, and approached the workout completely differently.  I was so used to doing the same set of movements over and over, that it broke me out of a routine.  Similarly, in other cultures, you’ll find that people approach every-day tasks in different ways than you’re accustomed to.  At first, new approaches may feel weird and uncomfortable, but after some time goes by, you will hopefully preceive that their approach is a new way to handle a situation, rather than thinking it’s “better” or “worse.  Furthermore, if you do feel stuck in a routine, trying one new thing dramatically shifts your insights!
3. I folded my body up in ways I didn’t know possible, in order to get a good stretch.  In fact, I really didn’t think it was possible to fold my legs as I did, and contemplated giving up.  So, when I succeeded, I felt uplifted!  When you have to learn a new language, or try a new food, or try new approaches to meeting people, you may feel it’s impossible to succeed.  However, if you’re willing to at least try, you may be pleasantly surprised.

Interesting development – government will now sponsor Expats working in Bahrain.  Click here for the full article.